July 28, 2006

prayer please

a couple of posts ago
i wrote about a lady at my church
Ms. A
who is undergoing treatment
for lung cancer

bad news today
it has spread to her liver
and she is having really bad headaches
that they can't pinpoint why

i am so upset by this
she is the absolute sweetest lady
such an example to me
with her faith and humble spirit

she has been through so much
in her life already
without the need for this new challenge
this horrible challenge

i ask that you please pray for this lady
the power of prayer is huge
and even if it is not God's will to heal her
pray for her comfort and strength

i just want her to remember that
the Lord is with her
always

and if you can
leave me a comment
so i can show her
that there are many, many people
who are willing to pray
she is not alone

thank you for doing this for me
but more than that
thank you for doing this for her

take care everybody

July 27, 2006

quotes

too tired today to say much
but have come across some
really good quotes in the last
week that i thought i'd share
you might recognize them...

from church on sunday
"just as I am,
poor, wretched, blind
sight, riches, healing of the mind,
yea, all i need thee to find
o lamb of God, I come, I come"

from the book i'm reading by lisa whelchel
"let us not become weary in doing good,
for at the proper time we will reap a harvest
if we do not give up." -Galatians 6:9

from a new friend's wonderful email
"when i stand before God at the end of my life,
i would hope that i would not have a single bit
of talent left and could say, "i used everything
you gave me." -Erma Bombeck

July 26, 2006

fashion boy


this is a picture from tuesday
of my little boy
he had on cool baseball shorts
and an old navy baseball jersey

he insisted that he wear
this winter fleece hat that my mom made
for my daughter

he wore it all day
even to my mother-in-law's house

i don't know if i should laugh
(which i did...a lot)
or be scared of his fashion sense

what a funny boy!
 Posted by Picasa

July 25, 2006

love, me

so today is the 25th of july
the midpoint between the
anniversaries of the two
saddest days of my life

the 20th marked 8 years
since my father lost the
last battle of his life

well, we think it was the 20th
because he was alone
when it happened and
no one is sure of anything
his death certificate reads the
day he was found
but i try not to think about that part

i call it the last battle of his life
because after he died
it became apparent that he
fought many things over the years
and most of the enemies were
within

having been such a small part
of my childhood
i was surprised at the emotion
i felt when he died
and i am even more surprised
by the feelings of regret and sadness
that remain
even after 8 years

there seems to be so much left
unresolved
so much left unsaid
and how do you resolve things
with someone who can't hear you?

but there is healing there
it is better than it used to be
i just never imagined it would
take so long to close the wounds

the 30th of this month
marks 14 years since my godmother died
she was a dynamic woman
who took time to help raise me
i named my daughter after her
and miss her in so many little ways

no matter how many years pass
there is always that fleeting moment
of sadness as these ten days
slip through the hourglass of time
these two people were so integral
in my childhood
for vastly different reasons
and the fact that the date
on which they died are days
from one another
is another of those ironic things
that makes me question
God's sovereignty

or my sanity

of course it is true
that His plan is perfect
and always works for good
and i rest in that truth

i praise you Lord
for blessing me with these
when i needed them most
thank you for their love
and thank you for teaching me
in my relationships with them

amen.

rest in peace
you two
i look forward
to seeing you again

"If you get there before I do, don't give up on me.
I'll meet you when my chores are through;
I don't know how long I'll be.
But I'm not gonna let you down, darling wait and see.
And between now and then, till I see you again,
I'll be loving you. Love, me."
-Collin Raye, "Love, Me"

July 24, 2006

he walks beside us

is there ever a time
when you hear news
and you wonder what
you could have done
differently?

i wonder why
my heart hurts so
for situations that
really have little to do
with me?

compassion is a strange thing.

there is a family
at my church that is
involved in everything
and i do mean everything
they are so faithful
in serving our church
and i am pretty close
to at least one or two of them
especially the mom
and the grandma

the mom's sister
the grandma's daughter
was killed last night
the details aren't real clear
but what i do know
tells me it was gruesome
and awful

she leaves behind a 13 year old son.

the situation was never ideal
from what i understand
but my heart hurts
for those left behind

i read something today
that reminds me that
no one is really alone
in times of crisis and the unknown
Jesus shares our pain
and walks beside us
trying to share the load

we just have to let him
isn't that the hard part?

O heavenly Father,
be with this family
especially the young
and the old
help this to bring glory
to your name
and good in midst of the
sadness and grief
gently remind them
that you have a plan
you always have a plan
and it is good
my heart aches for them, Lord
hold them up
give them strength

amen.

July 22, 2006

thankful

have been so amazed
at this blogging community

so many Christian women
full of faith
and encouraging eveyone

this is what i've been missing
since i chose the mommy path
and stopped shuffling money

the only thing
is that they are so open
and online that scares me
it's something i can't do

so i'll continue
to write in cryptics
and maybe there will be
a spot for me
somewhere

by the way
just wanted to mark
this special day
....drumroll....
my husband cleaned
two rooms of our house
while i took a nap (!!)
today

i am so thankful

and another thing
my son peed in his potty today
for the second time
which means the first one
wasn't a fluke...
we're on our way!

funny the things that
make a mommy happy

reading
taking care of the me in mommy
by lisa whelchel
very good stuff
help with squeezing
memory verses, prayer
and bible study
in a hectic day
at least that's what it has so far
only 2 chapters in
but i highly recommend it

take care everyone!

July 20, 2006

faith

it's one of those weeks
where you can't seem to catch up

i've worked at the bank
two days this week
which was actually fun
and not really like
work at all
except for the being on my feet
part

and it's vacation bible school
this week
and i'm in charge of the
preschool section this year
monday we had 8
tuesday we had 14 (!!)
and last night we had 10

it's good stuff but tiring
and of course i get to
see my baby girl every night
this way
which is always good

but it is so nice
to be home with my little lion
today
he is hosting his own
bible school at the moment
funny, funny stuff

no show on one of the showings
and no info on the other yet
wait, wait, wait

got this link from another blog
i was reading the other day
it's about a mom who was
just diagnosed with cancer
her story is so inspirational
that even in this time of fear
she is praising God
read her story here
and pray for her, if you will

this blogging community
is turning into such a blessing
to me

and one more thing
lady from my church
i'll her her Ms. A
has been in treatment
for lung cancer for
a little while now
actually this is the
second time for treatment
i think
the news is not so good
lately and that
upsets me
please pray for her too

i must remember that
God has a plan for every single one
of us and it is good
even if we don't understand
that's hard to swallow
sometimes
i guess that's where faith
fits into the picture

o Lord, thank you for
promising to be with us
always
and help me to have the
faith i need to remember that

amen.

July 18, 2006

fingers crossed

2 more showings
in next 24 hours

please pray, pray, pray

thanks!

sweet chicago



this week is the annual conference
for the company i do sales for
that bases itself just outside of
my favorite city in the world
(although my "world" is
extremely limited in terms
of the extent of my life travels)

and i couldn't go this year
for one reason or another
and i am so sad about that

i loved being around others
who loved the products
as much as me
no need to worry about
getting teased for being
excited about anything
in the catalog

i also felt kind of daring
out on the "wild" streets of Chicago
navigating my way around

and then there is the blue water
i walked blocks upon blocks
last year
to reach the navy pier
and tired as i was
it was so worth it

so here are a few pictures
of what i would be seeing this week
how nice to enjoy this
mini-vacation with you

ahh, sweet chicago

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July 17, 2006

can't sleep

so i've been upstairs
and read my magazine
('cuz i finished my book
last night)
and turned out the light
and laid there...
and tossed...
and laid there...

can't sleep
which is enormously strange
for me
the one who sleeps
before fully turning off the light

so i thought a nice cup
of decaf tea would be nice
we are out of sugar
how can a house be out of sugar?
my mom offered me some
today
and i said no, i just made kool-aid
and there's a little bit left in the jar

the "little bit" i just scraped out
with the end of a butter knife
and my tea is still bitter

i tried stirring it
(with a colored pencil
because i'm too lazy
to go to the other side
of the room to get a spoon)
still bitter

but my mug is a cute purple
and the tea is still warm
so i've got that going for me...

maybe the more i drink,
the sweeter it will get

oh, and as i stumbled
in the dark to quietly come
downstairs
i forgot my glasses

in the dark,
the world looks the same
with or without
glasses
and i wore my contacts today
so i didn't miss them on my face

now i am sitting
a foot and a half
from the computer screen
and have to squint every few seconds
to make sure i am typing the
right letters...

but somehow the meaningless
sentences continue to flow...

i'm sorry to whoever is reading this
i usually can sleep...
and we don't have this problem...

my magazine tonight
was home companion
it's from mary engelbreit
i love, love it
reminds me of country living
but more artsy
there is a home office in there
that i would die to have
okay, not die, but
you get my drift
blues, greens, whites
ahh...

a couple of posts back
i described my perfect "me place"
(and if i just did that right,
you can click on that and
read about it)
today in the sunday ads
(the best part of the paper)
i found the table desk
it exists!
so you know what that means?
you got it, my special place
exists - and in more than just my mind

between seeing that
and the magazine,
i think my mind is on overload
of all the possibilities...

upon site of the table desk
i decided to start a file
of all the things i find
that are "it" for someday
when "it" is a reality...
unfortunately
the magazine is a library one
so i can't rip out those pages
to keep
maybe they are still selling that issue
or maybe the magazine
will sell me one
hmm...

and with all that creativity
i am so anxious to work on
this awesome, new house
and tweak it as my very own
but then there's the money thing
anybody got any ideas on
cheap (as in free) ways
to decorate in the mean time?

eww, the last drink was pure sugar!
where has that been for the
last fifteen drinks?!

okay, it's way past my bedtime
and i agreed to work
shuffling money tomorrow
besides, this post is by far the longest
i have ever written
and i'm sure you are asleep by now

at least one of us is....

July 15, 2006

2 showings

spent a little time
at the old house
dusting and sweeping

2 showings today
back to back

haven't been any showings
in quite a few weeks
and no shows at the open house

ray of hope
peeking through...


July 14, 2006

cehb, it's about you!

i've come to the conclusion
that blogs are a good way to connect

my friend just started one
and the mini glimpse of
her every day life has been
wonderful for me!

it's like a phone conversation
in bits and pieces
and you learn things
that you would never know
in a million dinners

it's especially neat for me
in this instance
because it's someone
that the years drifted away
and now she's back
like a big ole gift
from God

cool stuff, man, cool stuff...

July 13, 2006

new cd

Amy Grant To Release First Live CD and DVD Recording In 25 Years

“TIME AGAIN….AMY GRANT LIVE” Releases On September 26th.


Cool stuff! The whole article with all the songs and stuff can be seen at www.amygrant.com.
She's my all-time favorite singer/songwriter. : )

bugs

yesterday
i had the whole zoo again
and i realized
that it only becomes a zoo
when the third one
enters the picture

that's the loud one too

by the end of the day
i had a headache
and felt like i'd run
a marathon
well, i think
i've never run a marathon

so today's slow start
has been much, much better

lots of decisions
to be made
in the next couple of days
been praying
but still confused
watched bug's life yesterday
and those bugs with the cones
on their butts that create the spotlight
make me laugh
i wish God would
light up the answers
like one of those bugs
lit up the sky

i'm so strange to connect
those bugs and answers to prayers
oh, well
i never claimed to be normal :)

July 12, 2006

library thing

Found a new web site called library thing

look at the bottom of the left side bar
ideally this will be the last five books i have read
at the moment, it isn't that
i just added all my favorites
and the way that it posts
they are all from the same series
and one from my wish list

if you click on "my library"
it will take you to my complete library
and they are tagged by subject
and of course, the wish list

just another way to share...enjoy!

pictures

bday bash
for double digit girl
last night

unhappy to leave
the party
she handled it
with such grace
a small crumple of her face
and reassurance
to her father
a girl after my own
aching heart
smoothing things
on the outside
even when the pain
is on the inside
it never gets easier

husband told me to
upload some pics
on my blog
feel weird about that
still adjusting to
the whole "world wide web"
once it's out there
it's really OUT THERE
so here's a few
i picked carefully
for now...



The classic helping-dad-mow-the-grass picture...


My trip to the zoo? I took a bunch of kangaroos and their trainer!


Trip to the Reds Museum a while back...here's the next future player. Needs to grow into that jersey a bit...


Daddy thinks this looks like Charlie Brown. I think it looks like the worried pitching coach heading back to the dugout...


We have a doe and a fawn that are living in the woods just beyond the tree line in the back yard. The fawn got brave one day and I snapped a picture. This is about eight feet from our back door.

by the way
i edited the html
to get these pictures
in the right place
big little bro
how 'bout that? :)

July 10, 2006

ten

i usually try to write
on my daughter's bday
but didn't get to it
this year

instead
i got to go to lunch
with her
first time in many years
that i got to see her on
her actual bday
people always ask
how can i do that?
doesn't it make me sad
or mad not to see her
on her bday?
i always want to say
what choice do i have?
fight and ruin her bday
or let it go and save it
for a fight worth winning?
of course, it kills me
when i can't see her - anytime
but especially her bday
after all, i still recall
the pain and fog and joy
of her first breath

wow, ten years, already

but i always say
it's okay
ever the peace maker, me
always relenting

anyway
the great news is
that i got to see her
and we went to the mall
(her choice, of course)
and she made a hello kitty
build-a-bear
with the brahms lullaby sound
in the hand
and a two piece swimsuit
with a tote bag
holding a towel, magazine,
and sunscreen lotion

she had a blast
(she always does when
she is spending money)
and the boys were very good
reading their books
and watching people

the time flew by too quickly
but i promised myself
i wouldn't be sad when i
dropped her off
even if it took loud music
on the radio

i try to look at the good stuff
and ignore the bad stuff
but it isn't always easy...

she went away for the weekend
to celebrate other bdays too
but i'll see her again tomorrow
as we celebrate her bday
with all the family
on this side of her life

i pray that she will one day
be completely whole
i think she has just enough spunk
to close the gap
between her two lives...

at least, that's what i pray...

happy birthday, pumpkin butt
i can't believe my baby girl
is now a double digit...

July 5, 2006

catching up

whew
busy long weekend

friday's festival
was fun for the kids
bbq sandwiches
and a hot dog

games
rock climbing
and puffy air
jumpy things
all free

saw a guy
i went to school with
kindergarten
to 12th grade
looked the same
only heavier
like all of us
didn't talk to him
nothing to say
but neat to see him
proves life moves on
for everyone

am saturday
picked up the herd
and headed to the parade
saw the mom of one
of the herd
sitting in the grass
turns out she
stepped on glass
and cut her foot
calling for help
on her cell phone
(where were we
without them?)
as the ambulance
and fire truck inch by
on the road
in front of us
she ended up with stitches
and crutches and
a big crimp in her day

i have no idea how the parade was
the girls really liked it
and had a ton of candy to share

crisis over
we headed to the zoo
hot, hot, hot
saw the gorillas
and sumatran rhinos
and cuddly koalas
(who spend 90% of their day
resting and sleeping -
my kind of animal....)
and bats
and cats
and manatees
and polar bears
and peacocks
and lorikeets
and kangaroos
and goats
and an emu

the girls had fun
and i survived
although did i mention
it was really hot?

ended up going to
the y for the free
swimming
the lion loved it
his purple lips as
he said he didn't
want to get out
of the water

fireworks capped off
the evening

canoeing on sunday
with family and friends
eleven of us in all
i think
good exercise and
wonderful company

the look on my husband's
face when he surfaced
from tipping his kayak
was priceless
surprise mixed with wounded pride
oh well
you needed to cool off anyway
mr. hottie ;)

i had company
with the full circus
on monday
the day went so much faster
with someone to share it with

makes today seem lonely

slow start to the fourth
which is the way i like it
cleaned the house
makes me happy today
mom and big little bro
had dinner with us
and then we were joined
by my sister-in-law-to-be
and her mom and sister
and sister's boyfriend
and muscles from moving day
for a private fireworks show
by our very own boys

it was nice to have everyone here
i'm easing into this entertaining thing
i think i like it

i've always wanted a big family
and even though they weren't
all family i can claim
it was great

okay that brings us up to date

watching these boys interact
is a trip -
a trip to the zoo!
(haven't i been there recently?)

back in the swing of things...

 
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