May 21, 2008

my new friend amy

i remember
standing in the hallway
by the gymnasium
eighth grade
the year almost complete
everyone goes
separate ways
to different schools
in a matter of days

i smuggled my walkman

to school
in a brown paper bag
with my favorite tape
by amy grant

from my breaking heart
i wanted to play
the prodigal
for my best friend
my first christian friend
who was taking a different path

than me the next year

somehow i knew
we wouldn't speak again
or see each other again
and you know
i was right

so standing there

between classes
with the shouts of others
i turned the volume
all the way up
and played...

"I face the day again

Against the window pane.
I remain your closest friend,
And wish you back again.
You wonder how I feel;

You think you've pushed too far.
If only you could see this pen
Scribbling down my heart.

I'll be waiting.
I may be young or old and gray,
Counting the days,
But I'll be waiting,
And when I finally see you come,
I'll run when I see you--
I'll meet you."

was i dramatic or what?

all these years later
after a detour into country music
my favorite singer remains
amy grant

for christmas
my husband teasingly gave me
a membership to her fan club
(after i asked for it two years in a row)

and for my birthday
he gave me tickets to her concert
she was coming to my state!
and i've been counting the days
ever since

see, part of the deal with her fan club
is that you can go to her sound checks
for free
just register beforehand and you're in

so i did

and you know what?
i met amy grant
it was surreal
she is so down to earth
and so real

but wait,
hang with me here
it's gets better!

well see part of the membership
also allows access to
these online message boards
and i read on those
that most people give amy
a card at the sound check

that felt fake to me
so i vetoed the idea
but then i figured
hey i can write a fan letter
i mean i am a fan

and as my husband so sweetly put it
i was going to the concert
three hours early
two and a half hours away
i was pretty much committed
to being a fan

so i wrote a little letter
just saying thanks
because her music
has really helped me
over the years
as we weathered
similar things in life

i gave it to her tour manager
as they quickly snapped my picture
with her
and it was over

i went on to the concert
it's amazing all the things you notice
when it isn't your first time
seeing the stage
or hearing the songs

a little after half way through the show
amy says that before the show
she received a letter
from a lady
and she just had to include a song
because of it
this lady and her had similar life experiences

my husband leans over
and says
is that you? is that your letter?

and i just nod
tears streaming down my face

amy says
so here's a song for my sister
and anyone else who knows
the healing power of God's forgiveness

and then she sings
my favorite song

as tears continued down my face

she sang a song for me
can you believe it?
it's been a week and a half
and i'm still wrapping my mind
around it all

on one hand
it seems like it was no big deal
and in the grand scheme of things
i guess it isn't
she's a regular person too
(a very famous one...)

but on the other hand
it was so cool!!!!
which may explain
my psycho look in this picture...

was i excited or what?

May 2, 2008

eve of 5

he wore shorts today
for the first time
this season

and suddenly revealed
were legs that weren't that long
a few months ago

he's a counter
and a scheduler
he wants to know when and why

we've been counting down
the days to his birthday
for months now

not seasons
like baseball
but still a long time

today he celebrated
at preschool
with chocolate chip cookies

it's cute
they call it their special day
and wear a glittered yellow crown

before they have their snack
the special day kid
sits on a stool in the middle of the circle

the kids all go around
and tell what's special
about the special kid

a couple of them
gave what must be the standard response
he's special because God made him

a couple others
gave the other standard
he's special because he plays with me

one cute little girl
whispered in his ear
that he was special because she loved him

watch out world!

it got me thinking
of all the reasons
i think he is special

they are mostly the same reasons
that all moms think
their kids are special

but it was a little more touching
on the eve of 5

because 5 seems to start everything
it's such a big step forward
my baby boy isn't so baby anymore

and while i'm happy
that he is growing so well
a small part of me is sad

my eyes filled with tears
as i got my last
four year old kisses tonight

but i was filled with hope
as i felt more than saw
his future spread before me

God filled me with peace
reminding me that He is in charge
and will always be with my son

even as he grows
right before my very eyes

happy birthday little man

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