January 17, 2006

the beat goes on...

same stuff, nothing new

continue to pray for
the sale of the other house

the sickness lingers in all of us
coughing, sore throats
heal us, o Lord

January 13, 2006


i thought about you all day
on what was the 82nd anniversary
of your birth
happy birthday to you

it's been 13 years
since you've been gone

my first crushing blow
of death
unless we count your momma

i can still hear and see my mom
even though she was on the other
side of the wall
talking to your sister on the phone
and i knew
you didn't make it

it sounds cruel
but i'm glad that you moved
back to your hometown
when i was younger
the distance lessened the pain
of you being taken away forever

on the day of your funeral
we ate hamburgers in the parking lot
of your apartment building
and i stared at the ruby and turquoise
glass pieces on your window sill
and remembered that summer we
went to the library and got our hair done with momma
and sat behind the building in reclining lawn chairs
reading our books

mine was about the flood

i often tour that apartment in my mind
and the one you had here too

the other day
i found the family tree we ciphered out
and i wrote in my messy young hand

you were so gracious to let me feel like
that family was somehow my own

i admired your spunk
and the twinkle in your eye
especially when you were a member of the gestapo

i remember your aquamarine ring
and you taught me the smell of bengay
and i still eat open face cheese sandwiches
with tomato and bacon
fresh from the toaster oven

and at christmas, you are never far from me
as i wrap present after present
but no one pays me with quarters to do it

not many flea markets around here anymore
but i always keep my eyes open
for a unique cup and saucer
of course, i would never pay full price

thank you for being there for me
happy birthday

January 11, 2006

circus with a cold

all these days gone by
and still everyone is
sniffling and coughing

and grouchy.

who could have guessed
there was that much junk
in everyone's head?

heal my family, Lord,
restore our health
so that we may better
face the challenges of
i also pray for the people
who will buy our old house,
prepare their hearts and
and do it quickly if you can :)
i know that it is all in your will
and time, not my own
but i can ask, right?
bless my marriage
give us your peace in this
stressful time

the circus is in session today
a selfish tiger, a busy lion,
and a curious monkey with no
george in sight
boys all around
i'm having a good time, really
i keep telling myself
those convincing words
praying they will sink in

i must go dress the lion
and hope that he won't
roar too loudly

is it nap time yet?
i'm tired....

January 3, 2006

new year

more than ten days has passed
since i have gotten a minute
to write down the thoughts
of my mind

it has been the busiest
ten days of the whole year

everyone has runny noses
or stuffy noses or tissue wiping
red noses
and sore throats
and coughs
and a big case of the grouchies

i have been longing to curl up
in bed for a few days and sleep
and i even managed to sleep in
once or twice
but still i'm run down
and coughing

being sick and all the activities
of the holidays
brought the fog back
and tired

what a horrible way to spend
the blessed Christmas season

i remind myself that it is just that
a Christmas season
my closeness to Christ isn't defined
by just a season
it evolves over all the seasons
of my life
it's just that some of the seasons
feel so long these days

someday soon
i'll wish for the chaos
but today
and the last few days
i wish for a time of rest
and quiet

why is it we always want
what we don't have?

on that note
i don't want
the extra weight
i do have
and i want to do something
about it this year
my resolution again
for the third year in a row
well, one of the years didn't count
because i was pregnant that year

so i'll try again...

the sweetest memory of new year's
(arm raised high with sippee cup of juice in hand)

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